Some cool stuff happened recently:
1) I convocated... Somehow, after the mindlessly incessant barrage of intellectual pain and anguish, I found the light at the end of the tunnel. The walk across the stage was a bit surreal, to be honest. I was congratulated by a number of persons, with a good few hundred more watching me (or their eyelids) while I strolled across the stage. Now that I'm breathing fresh air untainted by the prospect of another semester with broad undergrad topics, I think my brain is missing the slight burning sensation of being pushed to learn massive amounts in minuscule time periods. Perhaps another tunnel is just ahead....
2) I did the Graduate Records Examination. Oddly enough, it was not the hellish experience which I anticipated it being; the essays were remarkably smooth, and while I didn't do as well on the verbal as the math, in the latter I had to rush through because of one question which stumped me for a few minutes (the only big problem I had in the entire exam). I received 570 on the verbal section and 680 on the quantitative (math). In relation to other Social Science people, this is 90 points higher on the verbal and 110 higher on the math, so it should help a bit with grad schools.
3) I got the weekend shift at the sawmill. Overall, I'm pleased that I'll have so much extra time to go out and do other things, like find a volunteer position or another job somewhere. Unfortunately, my churchgoing will be eliminated, and with it the chance to hang out with my College and Career crowd. My solution to this is to hopefully schedule a few events for during the week so that at least some of the next few months is spent with other people.
Funny event of the week: yesterday I was walking around and talking with God (as I often like to do, even if it makes me seem crazy), and I asked Him for direction. Now, usually I'm not given any direct answer to this request, as it's a rather vague demand in and of itself... I guess the Lord wanted to humble me once again, as a second passed by and I looked down.... to see the compass on my camera bag re-adjusting towards north. Standing there dumbfounded, I had this sense in the back of my mind saying "you wanted direction, there ya go"..... As I keep saying, God really does have a great sense of humor.
Monday, June 11, 2007
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Update from the desert
Since it's now been a full month that I've been back in Kamloops, figures I should write about what's been happening lately. I'll try to refrain from my usual philosophizing on life events for this one, as not everything needs to have meaning beyond it's present state (in the words of Freud, "sometimes a cigar is just a cigar"...)
So after I got here and settled in (translation: after I overcame the initial feeling of Kamloops craziness), the usual unpacking of about 55% of all my junk occurred. This included everything from clothes to tea supplies, only the essential stuff came out of the boxes to make re-packing smooth and efficient, perhaps for the hypothetical situation of moving back down to the Coast or something.
An immediately pressing matter was re-connecting with my Church here, Summit Drive Baptist. I got home on a Sunday, just in time to head off to a College and Career event where we sat around and talked for a few hours. Of course, being from out of town at that point, I had no idea when it was or where it was... hence me showing up at the door of the organizing couple about an hour before the event actually started. yay. This wasn't bad because they happen to be great people and proceeded to give me punch and show me pictures of a recent Thailand excursion. With the C&C group, I've unfortunately not been the greatest at consistently being there through missing two weeks of hanging out with them. We'll see how it goes as the summer progresses... they all just seem to have their own lives which makes it hard for someone to quickly assimilate into those grooves.
Anyways, other re-connections with the church occurred in my first week, including a visit with pastor Harry, who I would on any top 5 list of "most wonderful people" simply for his personality. Over the years, he's given me a few books to read here and there which have really helped me along... though I've never had a mentor of any kind, Harry's likely part of the amalgamation of persons who have guided my spiritual growth. When I met with him this time, he put me on to a video series called "Bold Love" by Dr. Dan Allender which I'm not in a Discipleship class about... I'm about 4 sessions in and it's pretty interesting, especially considering my style is typically quite confrontational when there's an issue to be handled and Dan's way of going about it is right up that alley. I even get to lead the discussion this Sunday! I'm sure you all can guess how I'm gonna handle that one.
Oh yeah, and I got to go skiing at Blackcomb for two days!! SOOO AWESOME, and I use that word only when I really mean it took my breath away by sheer awe at God's beauty (and, consequently, how man can put some metal up there and make a buck off of it).
Soon I was at an orientation for doing entry watch at the Domtar pulp mill in Kamloops, a position I had last year in which I got to watch individuals as they entered/exited confined spaces and then made sure everyone was out when the day was up (or when an alarm went off). This year was actually much more interesting, at least for the first 5 days. I was tasked to work with an intriguing fellow named Bobby "Z" (his last name seemed to have every letter of the alphabet in it, so the shortening was necessary, particularly for the needs of such literate fellows as he often works with). Though this seems less than exciting, it really was compared to the students who had to sit in front of one hole for 10 hours marking people in and out; I got to go to multiple holes, gas testing when it was needed and ensuring that this one person was alive when he came out.
This guy knews a lot about recovery boilers, large compartments within a pulp mill designed to help with certain chemical reactions occuring in the process of creating pulp. Not only was Bob knowledgeable, he was meticulous... which meant that for the person following him there were many moments of waiting, both when he was in and out of the vessel (he loved to write things down in what I came to call "the report", a 1.5-inch think binder full of his notes about nearly every centimeter of tubing, gears, and other assorted machinery he could find). After 5 days of following Bob around and seeing how much everyone admired his work, I was rather inspired by his example of being the best at what he does... till the 6th day, when I ended up sitting in a room with other students, waiting for some work to come down the line. Ended up cleaning windows with a clever fellow named Josh (no, I did not dissociate my personality from the boredom, there was actually another person there named Josh... at least I believe there was).
While it earned me a lot of money for 6 days of work, this was the only work I have had in my time here in Kamloops so far. I have been looking for more work, not just here but also down in the lower mainland (you never know... might find the ultimate job down there), particularly in the health/human service areas. The only downside to living there would be that saving money for grad school becomes a null concept, and staying here means I save everything I make since my current room+food+everything else I could hope to have=no expense (to me, except for what my father would call my "inheritance"). Until today, job prospects were looking dim, but I got a call tonight and accepted a position at the sawmill for the summer, doing clean-up. At least I'll be busy for the rest of the summer, and who knows, maybe I'll find a cool volunteer position at a drug rehab place or somewhere that deals with grief a lot.
Other than all that, can't say much has been happening in my life. I was incredibly sick after the pulp mill job and only now am regaining my energy (putting it to good use playing squash and biking plenty)... Taking the GRE soon, which is an exam needed for applying to certain grad schools, so really hoping I can focus on preparing for that during the next week and a half.
Oh yeah, and my convocation is on June 7th... 2:30pm-ish, so if you're around Burnaby Mountain in the afternoon on that day be sure to stop by.
There's my life at the moment... God's been good, and keeps surprising me with little moments and big jobs, so all I know is He'll keep me in line one way or another. I'm hoping for the kind and gentle way; we all know how responsive we tend to be for those ones, though...
So after I got here and settled in (translation: after I overcame the initial feeling of Kamloops craziness), the usual unpacking of about 55% of all my junk occurred. This included everything from clothes to tea supplies, only the essential stuff came out of the boxes to make re-packing smooth and efficient, perhaps for the hypothetical situation of moving back down to the Coast or something.
An immediately pressing matter was re-connecting with my Church here, Summit Drive Baptist. I got home on a Sunday, just in time to head off to a College and Career event where we sat around and talked for a few hours. Of course, being from out of town at that point, I had no idea when it was or where it was... hence me showing up at the door of the organizing couple about an hour before the event actually started. yay. This wasn't bad because they happen to be great people and proceeded to give me punch and show me pictures of a recent Thailand excursion. With the C&C group, I've unfortunately not been the greatest at consistently being there through missing two weeks of hanging out with them. We'll see how it goes as the summer progresses... they all just seem to have their own lives which makes it hard for someone to quickly assimilate into those grooves.
Anyways, other re-connections with the church occurred in my first week, including a visit with pastor Harry, who I would on any top 5 list of "most wonderful people" simply for his personality. Over the years, he's given me a few books to read here and there which have really helped me along... though I've never had a mentor of any kind, Harry's likely part of the amalgamation of persons who have guided my spiritual growth. When I met with him this time, he put me on to a video series called "Bold Love" by Dr. Dan Allender which I'm not in a Discipleship class about... I'm about 4 sessions in and it's pretty interesting, especially considering my style is typically quite confrontational when there's an issue to be handled and Dan's way of going about it is right up that alley. I even get to lead the discussion this Sunday! I'm sure you all can guess how I'm gonna handle that one.
Oh yeah, and I got to go skiing at Blackcomb for two days!! SOOO AWESOME, and I use that word only when I really mean it took my breath away by sheer awe at God's beauty (and, consequently, how man can put some metal up there and make a buck off of it).
Soon I was at an orientation for doing entry watch at the Domtar pulp mill in Kamloops, a position I had last year in which I got to watch individuals as they entered/exited confined spaces and then made sure everyone was out when the day was up (or when an alarm went off). This year was actually much more interesting, at least for the first 5 days. I was tasked to work with an intriguing fellow named Bobby "Z" (his last name seemed to have every letter of the alphabet in it, so the shortening was necessary, particularly for the needs of such literate fellows as he often works with). Though this seems less than exciting, it really was compared to the students who had to sit in front of one hole for 10 hours marking people in and out; I got to go to multiple holes, gas testing when it was needed and ensuring that this one person was alive when he came out.
This guy knews a lot about recovery boilers, large compartments within a pulp mill designed to help with certain chemical reactions occuring in the process of creating pulp. Not only was Bob knowledgeable, he was meticulous... which meant that for the person following him there were many moments of waiting, both when he was in and out of the vessel (he loved to write things down in what I came to call "the report", a 1.5-inch think binder full of his notes about nearly every centimeter of tubing, gears, and other assorted machinery he could find). After 5 days of following Bob around and seeing how much everyone admired his work, I was rather inspired by his example of being the best at what he does... till the 6th day, when I ended up sitting in a room with other students, waiting for some work to come down the line. Ended up cleaning windows with a clever fellow named Josh (no, I did not dissociate my personality from the boredom, there was actually another person there named Josh... at least I believe there was).
While it earned me a lot of money for 6 days of work, this was the only work I have had in my time here in Kamloops so far. I have been looking for more work, not just here but also down in the lower mainland (you never know... might find the ultimate job down there), particularly in the health/human service areas. The only downside to living there would be that saving money for grad school becomes a null concept, and staying here means I save everything I make since my current room+food+everything else I could hope to have=no expense (to me, except for what my father would call my "inheritance"). Until today, job prospects were looking dim, but I got a call tonight and accepted a position at the sawmill for the summer, doing clean-up. At least I'll be busy for the rest of the summer, and who knows, maybe I'll find a cool volunteer position at a drug rehab place or somewhere that deals with grief a lot.
Other than all that, can't say much has been happening in my life. I was incredibly sick after the pulp mill job and only now am regaining my energy (putting it to good use playing squash and biking plenty)... Taking the GRE soon, which is an exam needed for applying to certain grad schools, so really hoping I can focus on preparing for that during the next week and a half.
Oh yeah, and my convocation is on June 7th... 2:30pm-ish, so if you're around Burnaby Mountain in the afternoon on that day be sure to stop by.
There's my life at the moment... God's been good, and keeps surprising me with little moments and big jobs, so all I know is He'll keep me in line one way or another. I'm hoping for the kind and gentle way; we all know how responsive we tend to be for those ones, though...
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
Finding water
Today I got the opportunity to walk along a path beside one of the two rivers running through Kamloops, my present abode. It's quite interesting... A lot of the vegetation around here is either very dry or highly maintained by human intervention. Yet next to the river there are a variety of greens and wonderfully blossoming flowers, I dare to say even nicer than much of Vancouver (mostly because the sun shines here instead of peeking in and out). I had an interesting thought while walking here: in other areas of life, we have to make sure we're near the right amount of living water to sustain us and make us grow.
So ever since I travelled back to Kamloops, I guess I've been trying to find the right source of water, you might say. Not necessarily just financially (really, though it should be more of a concern for me I'm not worrying terribly about that right now), it's more spiritually and socially. Coming back into a situation where everything's turned around and you can't seem to find your place makes it hard to set roots again... even for a nomadic fellow such as myself.
Somewhat frustrating is that, over the last little while, I've made an effort to grow closer to people around me, and somehow it's worked rather well. Great, right? Well... Not exactly when you end up moving away from those people (getting "transplanted" into another garden, if you're following the horticulture analogy) and have for the last many years not been so connected with others. Fortunately, I'm adapting to it now (slowly), remembering back to the days when me and God would hang out... Great guy to spend time with. Of course, google talk and MSN have helped plenty as well, but being in a situation where you're not surrounded by so many awesome people (at least, as closely surrounded) makes it all the more important to take it upon yourself to communicate effectively and personally with God (perhaps that's why monks and other cloistered persons develop such strong faiths).
Overall, I really hope you find sources of water around you, particularly Jesus, who said "but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life." (John 4:14). If you don't have such sources in your life, I urge you to check out some churches... and if you're in the vicinity of Burnaby Mountain around 6pm on a Sunday, I am positive you'll find many sources of water at the Point church.
Oh yeah, and immense thanks to all of you who have been springs of water for me... It's so often kept me going, in fact it still does.
So ever since I travelled back to Kamloops, I guess I've been trying to find the right source of water, you might say. Not necessarily just financially (really, though it should be more of a concern for me I'm not worrying terribly about that right now), it's more spiritually and socially. Coming back into a situation where everything's turned around and you can't seem to find your place makes it hard to set roots again... even for a nomadic fellow such as myself.
Somewhat frustrating is that, over the last little while, I've made an effort to grow closer to people around me, and somehow it's worked rather well. Great, right? Well... Not exactly when you end up moving away from those people (getting "transplanted" into another garden, if you're following the horticulture analogy) and have for the last many years not been so connected with others. Fortunately, I'm adapting to it now (slowly), remembering back to the days when me and God would hang out... Great guy to spend time with. Of course, google talk and MSN have helped plenty as well, but being in a situation where you're not surrounded by so many awesome people (at least, as closely surrounded) makes it all the more important to take it upon yourself to communicate effectively and personally with God (perhaps that's why monks and other cloistered persons develop such strong faiths).
Overall, I really hope you find sources of water around you, particularly Jesus, who said "but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life." (John 4:14). If you don't have such sources in your life, I urge you to check out some churches... and if you're in the vicinity of Burnaby Mountain around 6pm on a Sunday, I am positive you'll find many sources of water at the Point church.
Oh yeah, and immense thanks to all of you who have been springs of water for me... It's so often kept me going, in fact it still does.
Monday, April 30, 2007
God loves me...
Sorry to Shannon for stealing her line....
Today, as I was walking around Kamloops, beginning to readjust to my new/old abode, I came across something which I had believed impossible for Kamloopians: a tea store!! They were closed today, but I was almost speechless from the excitement for a brief moment.
Today, as I was walking around Kamloops, beginning to readjust to my new/old abode, I came across something which I had believed impossible for Kamloopians: a tea store!! They were closed today, but I was almost speechless from the excitement for a brief moment.
Friday, April 27, 2007
Death and Dying....
"Uhhh.... Like when people die?"
"Why? Isn't that stuff really depressing?"
"That's interesting...."
These are responses I've gotten when I mention I would like to do grief counseling (and the all-too common polite turning and walking away).
You know why I like grief counseling? Because it starts at the end of someone's life, when they have seen everything they have done and are prepared to take responsibility for actions, hurts, whatever they might have done which requires resolution. We live in worlds where pain and suffering are every day occurrences; statistics tell us so, our own senses tell us so if we can stop to listen for a moment. As we go about life, we can't do everything perfectly. We leave bumps in the road, loose threads in the tapestry, whichever analogy you prefer. These are often what can come to define us if we allow them to, but so much more so they end up being the times we look back on when near the end of our roads, which we only wish something could be done to ameliorate the brokenness caused by our past. Perhaps that's why I love Christ so much, because our brokenness highlights how amazing He was to die for it.
"Why? Isn't that stuff really depressing?"
"That's interesting...."
These are responses I've gotten when I mention I would like to do grief counseling (and the all-too common polite turning and walking away).
You know why I like grief counseling? Because it starts at the end of someone's life, when they have seen everything they have done and are prepared to take responsibility for actions, hurts, whatever they might have done which requires resolution. We live in worlds where pain and suffering are every day occurrences; statistics tell us so, our own senses tell us so if we can stop to listen for a moment. As we go about life, we can't do everything perfectly. We leave bumps in the road, loose threads in the tapestry, whichever analogy you prefer. These are often what can come to define us if we allow them to, but so much more so they end up being the times we look back on when near the end of our roads, which we only wish something could be done to ameliorate the brokenness caused by our past. Perhaps that's why I love Christ so much, because our brokenness highlights how amazing He was to die for it.
Thursday, April 12, 2007
Good and Faithful Servant
Today I got a call. Not a call one enjoys receiving, but one I've foreseen for some time.
It was my father, saying that my grandma had another in a recent series of heart attacks, and that she was now breathing through a respirator and not conscious. My first reaction was no reaction; what can one think when a person who you've seen so full of God's joy and peace suddenly becomes closer to His kingdom? I thought about all the things I have to get done in the next little while... Yes, I admit that the first things I told myself were that I had no time to visit her back in Kamloops, I have two exams to study for, a run to sign up for, and a sermon to write.
And here I am writing from a computer in Kamloops, just recently returned from the hospital where I visited her for what may be the last time. I got a serendipitous ride from my brother and sister-in-law, and will be heading back in the morning to resume my crazy-life activities, feeling calous, confused, and without the right words to express how much she means to me still.
Who was Peggy Smith, you may ask. Before I was a Christian, she was there loving me like Christ would if He had corporeal form again, and I have loved Grandma longer than I have consciously loved Jesus, although I'm sure she would rather it be the other way around. My life has been immensely blessed by her... She brought up five children in conditions which we might ascribe to poor persons, but from the accounts I have heard of her, she was never of poor spirit. So often I've felt alone in the world, and remembering her made it feel better because there was no way I could deny how much she loved me. Not only this, but it is her wisdom that got me through some of the worst parts of my life; she and my grandpa gave me my first Bible, and wrote Joshua 1:9 as the commemoration verse. When I look at the lives of anyone in chuch, so often I realize that Peggy was more than just a person, she was a saint everywhere she went, spreading the will and purpose of God into everyone she met. Now, while I hope it is not her last moments which I see, she may soon be with the God she has strived to serve all her life with a faith that strengthens me day to day. I can think of no one more deserving of hearing the phrase...
'Well done, good and faithful servant!', indeed.
She passed away at about 9:00am on April 13, 2007.
It was my father, saying that my grandma had another in a recent series of heart attacks, and that she was now breathing through a respirator and not conscious. My first reaction was no reaction; what can one think when a person who you've seen so full of God's joy and peace suddenly becomes closer to His kingdom? I thought about all the things I have to get done in the next little while... Yes, I admit that the first things I told myself were that I had no time to visit her back in Kamloops, I have two exams to study for, a run to sign up for, and a sermon to write.
And here I am writing from a computer in Kamloops, just recently returned from the hospital where I visited her for what may be the last time. I got a serendipitous ride from my brother and sister-in-law, and will be heading back in the morning to resume my crazy-life activities, feeling calous, confused, and without the right words to express how much she means to me still.
Who was Peggy Smith, you may ask. Before I was a Christian, she was there loving me like Christ would if He had corporeal form again, and I have loved Grandma longer than I have consciously loved Jesus, although I'm sure she would rather it be the other way around. My life has been immensely blessed by her... She brought up five children in conditions which we might ascribe to poor persons, but from the accounts I have heard of her, she was never of poor spirit. So often I've felt alone in the world, and remembering her made it feel better because there was no way I could deny how much she loved me. Not only this, but it is her wisdom that got me through some of the worst parts of my life; she and my grandpa gave me my first Bible, and wrote Joshua 1:9 as the commemoration verse. When I look at the lives of anyone in chuch, so often I realize that Peggy was more than just a person, she was a saint everywhere she went, spreading the will and purpose of God into everyone she met. Now, while I hope it is not her last moments which I see, she may soon be with the God she has strived to serve all her life with a faith that strengthens me day to day. I can think of no one more deserving of hearing the phrase...
'Well done, good and faithful servant!', indeed.
She passed away at about 9:00am on April 13, 2007.
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Update; Looking to the future
To set everything straight: I applied to one university, SFU, and have now been informed that I will not be doing graduate studies there in the Fall. After this semester ends, I will officially be done my Bacchelor's of Arts and Social Sciences at SFU, majoring in Psychology and minoring in English. Given I have no more school to return to in the Fall semester, I will be in Kamloops until I have reason to depart and find either employment or further education somewhere outside the neo-desert climate.
I understand that there are some feelings of loss within those people with whom I interact regularly, and while I do understand that it is difficult whenever someone leaves for a time, I have some brief thoughts on this. I am not dying or dead. I am not being isolated on a small island with no ability to communicate, nor is this a situation I wish my life to be, even in a more at-home-isolation sense. Loving others involves attachment of some kind, and the deepest love comes by knowing the plight and joy of others is also your own because you are as part of them and they of you as your thumb is a part of your hand. This is really the image I want to impart: my person will not be in Vancouver anymore, but what I am able to do is keep in touch and keep myself attached (to the best of my abilities) with those I have formed bonds with in the lower mainland. At no point would I want people to grieve a loss that isn't there, and with my departure I may be gone for awhile, but if I know to make the effort to keep in touch, I will do so.
You might be curious as to what I plan to do in the future. Over the coming months, I will move back to Kamloops and find whatever work possible, hoping to discover something counseling-related. The GRE is one endeavor for the summer, for I wish to apply to UBC in December (or sooner, if possible), after this applying again to SFU with every trick I know. I approximate about a year and a half before I get back into school, but maybe I'll find something for the Spring semester, you never know.
All in all, I want to lay my future out for God's plans, and submit myself to His will. He has guided me thus far, and I am confident He'll take me the rest of the way when I am ready. I really have appreciated all the care and prayer which has come from so many people over the years, and I know it was desired for me to end up back at SFU in the Fall, but let me tell you that the connections we have in Christ are stronger than whatever distance or time can ravage against relationships. Those friends I have made here will continue to be in my prayers, and I'm sure I'll pop into theirs as well from time to time.
I'll keep you up to date on my goings on after I've shipped off back over the mountains. May God's peace be within you and all around you.
I understand that there are some feelings of loss within those people with whom I interact regularly, and while I do understand that it is difficult whenever someone leaves for a time, I have some brief thoughts on this. I am not dying or dead. I am not being isolated on a small island with no ability to communicate, nor is this a situation I wish my life to be, even in a more at-home-isolation sense. Loving others involves attachment of some kind, and the deepest love comes by knowing the plight and joy of others is also your own because you are as part of them and they of you as your thumb is a part of your hand. This is really the image I want to impart: my person will not be in Vancouver anymore, but what I am able to do is keep in touch and keep myself attached (to the best of my abilities) with those I have formed bonds with in the lower mainland. At no point would I want people to grieve a loss that isn't there, and with my departure I may be gone for awhile, but if I know to make the effort to keep in touch, I will do so.
You might be curious as to what I plan to do in the future. Over the coming months, I will move back to Kamloops and find whatever work possible, hoping to discover something counseling-related. The GRE is one endeavor for the summer, for I wish to apply to UBC in December (or sooner, if possible), after this applying again to SFU with every trick I know. I approximate about a year and a half before I get back into school, but maybe I'll find something for the Spring semester, you never know.
All in all, I want to lay my future out for God's plans, and submit myself to His will. He has guided me thus far, and I am confident He'll take me the rest of the way when I am ready. I really have appreciated all the care and prayer which has come from so many people over the years, and I know it was desired for me to end up back at SFU in the Fall, but let me tell you that the connections we have in Christ are stronger than whatever distance or time can ravage against relationships. Those friends I have made here will continue to be in my prayers, and I'm sure I'll pop into theirs as well from time to time.
I'll keep you up to date on my goings on after I've shipped off back over the mountains. May God's peace be within you and all around you.
Friday, February 02, 2007
Pictures
I should note that I've uploaded pictures to:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/josh4242/
Feel free to visit and check them out. (also a link on the side of the screen)
http://www.flickr.com/photos/josh4242/
Feel free to visit and check them out. (also a link on the side of the screen)
Thursday, January 25, 2007
Thoughts on thinking and Church.
Life isn't easy sometimes... More often than not, events and people can get under your skin if you aren't careful, and then you have to deal with issues outside of yourself. This really worries me, as I have trouble enough dealing with issues inside myself let alone those outside. This also really worries me because when I have too many difficulties outside my normal levels of crazy, I like to start taking it out on everyone else, such as in the past little while with my grad application. I then end up doubling or tripling the average amount of critical, cynical commentary which comes out of my mouth while decreasing the constructive statements I enjoy giving but for which I at times lack generative ability.
In the weeks (more than month) between my last post and this one, I thought of putting up different kinds of topics, most of which I could talk about in my full-boar cynicism and wit.
Yet I really didn't want to. Raving about the inadequecies of life is fun, but probably not worth spending the time writing onto a blog, especially if I'm only updating it every month or so. My existence isn't long enough to dwell endlessly on the unhopeful things in life without taking hold of what might be done or is already happening to rectify the situation, so I hope that is conveyed from now on.
I'm done with dwelling on these irrelevant past issues to which I've died many times over, yet can't ever seem to get away from.
So I ask the questions what's church to you? and what does home mean to you?
I ask of course because, in my little world, the feeling of home has no definition. I may feel at home wherever I am, or perhaps I actually feel lost all the time, but I cannot remember what it felt like to have a permanent, identifiable home which one "belongs" to.
I would like to say that my home is where I feel accepted and understood (loved) by everyone around me, where I recognize everything even if I haven't been there for a really long time. God so often gives me that feeling when I don't expect to have it, but at times being in our culture of individuality and isolation reminds me that no matter who I am with, the amount of closeness required for such a wonderful feeling of comfort is still somehow out of reach. And this applies everywhere I go: public transit, lecture halls, restaurants... They all seem to perpetuate this idea that we are all separate beings, all so distinct that to act as though we're interconnected is to feel like an outcast; this ultimately leads me to feel like a stranger in a foreign world, constantly where I may not belong.
I'm not sure where I could get that feeling of understanding, of recognition, of being connected to everyone but still know who I am in God's creation... I guess that's what I want the church to be: home.
In the weeks (more than month) between my last post and this one, I thought of putting up different kinds of topics, most of which I could talk about in my full-boar cynicism and wit.
Yet I really didn't want to. Raving about the inadequecies of life is fun, but probably not worth spending the time writing onto a blog, especially if I'm only updating it every month or so. My existence isn't long enough to dwell endlessly on the unhopeful things in life without taking hold of what might be done or is already happening to rectify the situation, so I hope that is conveyed from now on.
I'm done with dwelling on these irrelevant past issues to which I've died many times over, yet can't ever seem to get away from.
So I ask the questions what's church to you? and what does home mean to you?
I ask of course because, in my little world, the feeling of home has no definition. I may feel at home wherever I am, or perhaps I actually feel lost all the time, but I cannot remember what it felt like to have a permanent, identifiable home which one "belongs" to.
I would like to say that my home is where I feel accepted and understood (loved) by everyone around me, where I recognize everything even if I haven't been there for a really long time. God so often gives me that feeling when I don't expect to have it, but at times being in our culture of individuality and isolation reminds me that no matter who I am with, the amount of closeness required for such a wonderful feeling of comfort is still somehow out of reach. And this applies everywhere I go: public transit, lecture halls, restaurants... They all seem to perpetuate this idea that we are all separate beings, all so distinct that to act as though we're interconnected is to feel like an outcast; this ultimately leads me to feel like a stranger in a foreign world, constantly where I may not belong.
I'm not sure where I could get that feeling of understanding, of recognition, of being connected to everyone but still know who I am in God's creation... I guess that's what I want the church to be: home.
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
Especially Joshes can be imperfect....
I realize that I'm not often open about my less-than-pristine moments, so I decided to go out on a limb (pretty far out) and type up a recent entry in my journal. Sorry if it's kinda corny, just happened to be what I was feeling at the time. If nothing else, I hope it gives someone hope for when life seems uncertain and uncontrollable.
Joshua,
Where is your faith? Has God not provided for you again and again, no matter your need, unrelated to how freaked out you become over everything? Do not set your worries on your own affairs. God is in control of all, and will not let you fall, irregardless of what your circumstances may seem like. God's plans for you are good, and you are along His journey for you as He has desired you to be. You feel lonely, without anyone to comfort you as you feel continually denied in authentic connections with others, yet God is there when you cry in what seems to be an empty room. While you're thinking He's not there, keep in mind that He is the room; He is the air you use to speak and sing in times both good and bad. You have failed in keeping strong friendships alive; you've failed also in controlling your thoughts and emotions, the parts of you which force you time and time again to admit your inadequacy. Where you failed utterly, you have succeeded joyfully in God. He is your stongest friendship, deeper than any human could fathom. He helps you when emotions roll free and the dark clouds of frustration and stress roll in, deepening your connection to Him in what is so precious a thing to have, that God did all in His power to obtain it with you. Confusion is only natural, uncertainty the only certainty, so your frets and worries, while seemingly real now, will soon dissolve into the patience of eternity and joy of purity.
Never forget (which is harder than always remembering):
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous.
Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. For the
Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.
Joshua 1:9 (emphasis mine)
Joshua,
Where is your faith? Has God not provided for you again and again, no matter your need, unrelated to how freaked out you become over everything? Do not set your worries on your own affairs. God is in control of all, and will not let you fall, irregardless of what your circumstances may seem like. God's plans for you are good, and you are along His journey for you as He has desired you to be. You feel lonely, without anyone to comfort you as you feel continually denied in authentic connections with others, yet God is there when you cry in what seems to be an empty room. While you're thinking He's not there, keep in mind that He is the room; He is the air you use to speak and sing in times both good and bad. You have failed in keeping strong friendships alive; you've failed also in controlling your thoughts and emotions, the parts of you which force you time and time again to admit your inadequacy. Where you failed utterly, you have succeeded joyfully in God. He is your stongest friendship, deeper than any human could fathom. He helps you when emotions roll free and the dark clouds of frustration and stress roll in, deepening your connection to Him in what is so precious a thing to have, that God did all in His power to obtain it with you. Confusion is only natural, uncertainty the only certainty, so your frets and worries, while seemingly real now, will soon dissolve into the patience of eternity and joy of purity.
Never forget (which is harder than always remembering):
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous.
Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. For the
Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.
Joshua 1:9 (emphasis mine)
Sunday, December 17, 2006
Hooked on Courses?
As my final semester of undergraduate post-secondary learning approaches, I feel it pertinent to address an issue of the education system which does not always have its proper moments. I am, of course, talking about the fact that University will suck your life dry if you let it.
Now, keep in mind that my grades are not pristine, so the potentially euphoric high one receives (comparable only to having the pleasure centre of your brain directly stimulated, as I hear it, at least) once obtaining the all-powerful and nigh-Everest-like acheivement of straight A's (or A+'s if you're really going for it) I have yet to experience. Therefore, I admit to not having exactly the most objective viewpoint on this, but the fact is that my viewpoint is only rarely objective, and when it is, things get screwy to say the least; so I will give you my straightforward opinion on the whole thing.
University, like most things semi-addictive in nature, is a tool. It can be used for good, and it can most definitely be used for evil. There is no direct morality taught, nor personal development forced upon its inhabitants. These you must develop for yourself, and if you believe that your classes are going to do it for you, you are in for a very pluralistic and relativistic journey, at the end of which you will be more confused about what is right and wrong than after all the lectures of "Quantum Mechanics as applied to the socioeconomic impact of the Osprey Monkey and its implications for the history and meaning of life 101".
Yet education at times promises this enlightening aspect. With all the knowledge of the world at your fingertips, you must be able to stumble across wisdom which will form your personality and make you the person you need to become; after all, all these dead people found something to write about. And so people strive year after year to find these pieces of themselves in every place but within their own heart.
Even worse, some believe that they will find themselves after graduating, that their job of choice is just waiting on the outside of these struggles for a letter grade and if they push out a few more A's, they will find what they are looking for both personally and professionally. Two points: one; as I understand it, the majority of jobs these days are found through networking and less through good grades; two; my recommendation is to start the journey for who you want to be now, because it is not short.
So I ask: what are you looking for in your education, and are you sure you are not making education your life, instead of making life your education?
We need to find life, hope, love, etc.; not life in a dusty book where the words can seem just as distant as a professor can when talking on their subject of choice. Life was not meant to be lived in a dark room looking at cells or writing thousands of lines of code each day.
Life was meant to be lived with God, with purpose. Education cannot be our final goal, because it is short-lived and finite in nature. Learning can be life-long, as it should be, yet you can accumulate any number of degrees or take all the courses a university has to offer, but there is no way you can live your life fully if you do not know what's behind the learning.
As I come close to graduating, I look back and see that I am not ashamed of the hours I spent with people instead of with textbooks, nor the many extra-curricular activities I have busied myself with during the past 4.5 years of University. Over the many years I have been part of SFU, I know this one thing: involvement in your community will give you your best memories, teach you your most profound lessons, and allow you your greatest opportunities to reach others.
If 80% of the work in community groups and volunteer organizations is done by 20% of the population, I now know why I only meet about 2 out of 10 people who never cease to keep me inspired and alive; I guess the rest of them must be looking for inspiration in their lecture notes.
Now, keep in mind that my grades are not pristine, so the potentially euphoric high one receives (comparable only to having the pleasure centre of your brain directly stimulated, as I hear it, at least) once obtaining the all-powerful and nigh-Everest-like acheivement of straight A's (or A+'s if you're really going for it) I have yet to experience. Therefore, I admit to not having exactly the most objective viewpoint on this, but the fact is that my viewpoint is only rarely objective, and when it is, things get screwy to say the least; so I will give you my straightforward opinion on the whole thing.
University, like most things semi-addictive in nature, is a tool. It can be used for good, and it can most definitely be used for evil. There is no direct morality taught, nor personal development forced upon its inhabitants. These you must develop for yourself, and if you believe that your classes are going to do it for you, you are in for a very pluralistic and relativistic journey, at the end of which you will be more confused about what is right and wrong than after all the lectures of "Quantum Mechanics as applied to the socioeconomic impact of the Osprey Monkey and its implications for the history and meaning of life 101".
Yet education at times promises this enlightening aspect. With all the knowledge of the world at your fingertips, you must be able to stumble across wisdom which will form your personality and make you the person you need to become; after all, all these dead people found something to write about. And so people strive year after year to find these pieces of themselves in every place but within their own heart.
Even worse, some believe that they will find themselves after graduating, that their job of choice is just waiting on the outside of these struggles for a letter grade and if they push out a few more A's, they will find what they are looking for both personally and professionally. Two points: one; as I understand it, the majority of jobs these days are found through networking and less through good grades; two; my recommendation is to start the journey for who you want to be now, because it is not short.
So I ask: what are you looking for in your education, and are you sure you are not making education your life, instead of making life your education?
We need to find life, hope, love, etc.; not life in a dusty book where the words can seem just as distant as a professor can when talking on their subject of choice. Life was not meant to be lived in a dark room looking at cells or writing thousands of lines of code each day.
Life was meant to be lived with God, with purpose. Education cannot be our final goal, because it is short-lived and finite in nature. Learning can be life-long, as it should be, yet you can accumulate any number of degrees or take all the courses a university has to offer, but there is no way you can live your life fully if you do not know what's behind the learning.
As I come close to graduating, I look back and see that I am not ashamed of the hours I spent with people instead of with textbooks, nor the many extra-curricular activities I have busied myself with during the past 4.5 years of University. Over the many years I have been part of SFU, I know this one thing: involvement in your community will give you your best memories, teach you your most profound lessons, and allow you your greatest opportunities to reach others.
If 80% of the work in community groups and volunteer organizations is done by 20% of the population, I now know why I only meet about 2 out of 10 people who never cease to keep me inspired and alive; I guess the rest of them must be looking for inspiration in their lecture notes.
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
What makes people act in good or evil ways?
These are the first two paragraphs (so far) of my paper for a "Social Psychology of Good and Evil" course. I may upload the whole thing when it's done (as it is due tomorrow), but for now I figured I'd see what people think of the intro.
"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing." Edmund Burke
It is easy to see the world as all-good or all-evil. From cognitive psychology, studies in schematic thinking and heuristics tell us that making easy, definable categories which are performable in automatic ways will simplify a person’s life. While defining each can be a mess of logic, consensus, and parsimony, we all have within us some very real sense of certain acts being good or evil. In studies of morality, questions abound as to the nature of what “good” people are and what makes them different from “bad” people, if differences exist. In what often seems the bleakness of the world, its obsidian shroud of relativism and selfish desire, there can be some who uphold a strict moral code and believe in the pervasiveness of good over destructive behaviour and intent. To reach such a state of virtuous action, these “moral exemplars” have developed to act morally out of an “uniting of self and morality” (Colby & Damon, 1992, p. 310). Not only can these people be admired for their moral state, but their example allows an in-depth look into what bridges the divides between evil, neutral, and good.
In this paper, it will be argued that good and evil actions have their roots in how integrated one’s sense of self is with one’s sense of humanity, morality, and purpose. By “good”, I mean to say constructively adding to humanity through beneficial acts to individuals or groups, whereas “evil” will be defined as avoidable harm committed against others or the unwillingness to help avoid or alleviate harm if such is possible and will not result in further harm done. Alternatively, another appropriate definition is provided by “Irving Sarnoff: ‘Evil is knowing better but doing worse’” (Zimbardo, 2004, p. 22). Since they are not mutually exclusive, both definitions for evil will be utilized. Since “humanity” can be defined in different ways, here it refers to all human “in-groups” being conceptualized as unified, and a respect for humanity denoting some degree of reverence for “the value of human beings and of human life, their worth” (Colby & Damon, p. 317).
Hopefully no plagiarism will be taken from the above, but I'm sure if you want the reference the date and author will give you enough, and if not I can definitely mention it later.
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
On Solo Film-Viewing
I'm not a loner.
At least, I make the most sincere effort not to be; however, I have to give a recommendation to anyone who enjoys movies: try watching them alone. What? "Movies are supposed to be a social event, something you do with friends". Sure, you can use movies as social events, but I'd like to make the point that this is probably the worst thing you can do when you want to hang out with people: sit in a large, dark room while following a story on the screen (if that's the kind of movie you're at, that is). Not only does each person in a group have a different perspective on the film, each person afterwards feels obligated to validate the choice of movie-going by saying how they liked or disliked it, with whatever opinion comes first typically being the eventual consensus because, after all, you're not there to enjoy a movie, you're there to enjoy each other's company.
Those who know me, know that I frequently go to movies alone. This, of course, is not to insult anyone or to establish that I am in fact an individual (I have enough evidence of that already). The reason for solo movie-going is to gauge the movie's merits myself, independent of any other opinions of those people I may have some obligation to agree with on some level. Recently, I saw "Stranger Than Fiction" (which I recommend on the basis of having very interesting perspectives on the value of one's life, death, and just basic morality itself), and I know that if I had seen it with anyone I know, I would definitely not have enjoyed it nearly as much. I will admit a primary reason for this is that I care what others think of me, because it's usually me who chooses the movie, thus the evaluation of the movie is also an evaluation of me as a movie-chooser.
"What about sharing the experience with others?" Rent. You can fast forward, rewind, pause, whatever the situation requires. In fact, if you rent, I believe you'll enjoy the movie more because you will see it in a comfortable environment, and you can actually see the people around you. Awkwardness doesn't go away for me, unfortunately, but at least people have the option of talking without ruining the experience of unknown persons, and in fact more opportunity is given to "constructively review" the movie as you're watching (often in the form of jovial commentary, of course).
All in all, don't take my word for it, as I'm not always the exemplar for normal. Try it with some movie that you think you would enjoy, but are unsure if anyone else would have as good a time as you would. For anyone who thinks that I'm just taking too much time to speak on a completely irrelevant issue, a) you're the one who's read this, and b) really, there are more irrelevant things in the world.
Oh yeah, anyone wanna go to a movie?
At least, I make the most sincere effort not to be; however, I have to give a recommendation to anyone who enjoys movies: try watching them alone. What? "Movies are supposed to be a social event, something you do with friends". Sure, you can use movies as social events, but I'd like to make the point that this is probably the worst thing you can do when you want to hang out with people: sit in a large, dark room while following a story on the screen (if that's the kind of movie you're at, that is). Not only does each person in a group have a different perspective on the film, each person afterwards feels obligated to validate the choice of movie-going by saying how they liked or disliked it, with whatever opinion comes first typically being the eventual consensus because, after all, you're not there to enjoy a movie, you're there to enjoy each other's company.
Those who know me, know that I frequently go to movies alone. This, of course, is not to insult anyone or to establish that I am in fact an individual (I have enough evidence of that already). The reason for solo movie-going is to gauge the movie's merits myself, independent of any other opinions of those people I may have some obligation to agree with on some level. Recently, I saw "Stranger Than Fiction" (which I recommend on the basis of having very interesting perspectives on the value of one's life, death, and just basic morality itself), and I know that if I had seen it with anyone I know, I would definitely not have enjoyed it nearly as much. I will admit a primary reason for this is that I care what others think of me, because it's usually me who chooses the movie, thus the evaluation of the movie is also an evaluation of me as a movie-chooser.
"What about sharing the experience with others?" Rent. You can fast forward, rewind, pause, whatever the situation requires. In fact, if you rent, I believe you'll enjoy the movie more because you will see it in a comfortable environment, and you can actually see the people around you. Awkwardness doesn't go away for me, unfortunately, but at least people have the option of talking without ruining the experience of unknown persons, and in fact more opportunity is given to "constructively review" the movie as you're watching (often in the form of jovial commentary, of course).
All in all, don't take my word for it, as I'm not always the exemplar for normal. Try it with some movie that you think you would enjoy, but are unsure if anyone else would have as good a time as you would. For anyone who thinks that I'm just taking too much time to speak on a completely irrelevant issue, a) you're the one who's read this, and b) really, there are more irrelevant things in the world.
Oh yeah, anyone wanna go to a movie?
Monday, November 06, 2006
Saved by a paper
Ever had one of those moments where you feel like doing something, but in your heart you know it's not exactly you who wants to do it?
I've had a few moments like that recently. No idea if it was God speaking to me or through me, as I know He does happen to do once in awhile (oft times to both my surprise and bewilderment, and not always reinforcing my ways of life).
One seeming God-moment was when I was feeling completely drained last night after being with what felt like a hundred people (but in fact was only a few I had not seen in awhile). It wasn't a feeling I usually have, like a filled-in-hollow-burned-out kinda thing. So, I ended up wanting to do what anyone would in such a situation: go jogging. Fortunately for what I am sure would have been both my physical and mental well-being, someone asked me to read over their paper, which I am always excited to do as it combines my passions for helping people, being critical, and improving my writing skills. So after a jog over to their place, I read through and gave my suggestions for the paper, which was really more flow-deficient in a few places than all-out horrible. And after that, we somehow got onto the topic of friends and deep conversations, both of which I struggle to attract. Yet as I sat there listening (a pasttime I've come to appreciate more and more), I realized that not only am I struggling to find what Larry Crab would describe as "spiritual community", but that others seem to want more from their fellow Christians than talk about the radio or how a job is going. I have no idea if this person had the need to talk about it in depth, but I definitely had the need to listen to what was said.
I have the feeling that there are times when God needs us to not only listen to him, but listen to others as well. While there is no doubt in my mind that last night was a blessing in what was before then a rather spiritually unfulfilling day (and considering I went to church, it probably should not have been), I do wish that I had some idea of how to create a deeper community among those people I'm close to. Given my propensity for analyzing the logic of relationships (whether friends or otherwise; see "odd but valid question" post earlier), it seems like I have a long way to go before that happens, but seeing as nothing is impossible for God, I guess I just need to leave myself open to more of these "God-moments" and see what happens.
I've had a few moments like that recently. No idea if it was God speaking to me or through me, as I know He does happen to do once in awhile (oft times to both my surprise and bewilderment, and not always reinforcing my ways of life).
One seeming God-moment was when I was feeling completely drained last night after being with what felt like a hundred people (but in fact was only a few I had not seen in awhile). It wasn't a feeling I usually have, like a filled-in-hollow-burned-out kinda thing. So, I ended up wanting to do what anyone would in such a situation: go jogging. Fortunately for what I am sure would have been both my physical and mental well-being, someone asked me to read over their paper, which I am always excited to do as it combines my passions for helping people, being critical, and improving my writing skills. So after a jog over to their place, I read through and gave my suggestions for the paper, which was really more flow-deficient in a few places than all-out horrible. And after that, we somehow got onto the topic of friends and deep conversations, both of which I struggle to attract. Yet as I sat there listening (a pasttime I've come to appreciate more and more), I realized that not only am I struggling to find what Larry Crab would describe as "spiritual community", but that others seem to want more from their fellow Christians than talk about the radio or how a job is going. I have no idea if this person had the need to talk about it in depth, but I definitely had the need to listen to what was said.
I have the feeling that there are times when God needs us to not only listen to him, but listen to others as well. While there is no doubt in my mind that last night was a blessing in what was before then a rather spiritually unfulfilling day (and considering I went to church, it probably should not have been), I do wish that I had some idea of how to create a deeper community among those people I'm close to. Given my propensity for analyzing the logic of relationships (whether friends or otherwise; see "odd but valid question" post earlier), it seems like I have a long way to go before that happens, but seeing as nothing is impossible for God, I guess I just need to leave myself open to more of these "God-moments" and see what happens.
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
Hilarious List....
My brother pointed me to this list,
http://www.eviloverlord.com/lists/overlord.html
It basically outlines what this guy would do if he was an evil overlord, essentiall how he'd avoid the all-too-common mistakes of past evildoers.
Now if only Bond villains would read it....
http://www.eviloverlord.com/lists/overlord.html
It basically outlines what this guy would do if he was an evil overlord, essentiall how he'd avoid the all-too-common mistakes of past evildoers.
Now if only Bond villains would read it....
Thursday, July 13, 2006
Amazing generosity in Kamloops
So I'm now the Summer Safety Coordinator for the Kamloops Brain Injury Association. It's a pretty sweet job, considering I get to bike around Kamloops for a few hours a day and get paid for it. However, I've found something very surprising: companies actually will give you stuff if you're using it for a good cause.
My job essentially entails enforcing and promoting the Skateboard Rewards Program for the KBIA, where I go to skate parks and the like and give rewards to people wearing helmets. Rewards include anything I receive from local businesses and last year ranged between a 2 for 1 coupon to t-shirts and $25 gift certificates.
This year, I decided that I need to aim high. So I contacted over 60 places, asking if they had anything they might be able to donate. To my surprise, I had 3 responses before I even began phoning all the businesses for follow-up. I've now accumulated t-shirts, DVD's, stickers, keychains, gift certificates, and more, all in the span of 3 days, and what's even more amazing is that I'm not even half way through all the places that sound like they might also donate something.
This brang up a question for me. As the DVBS director at my Church last year, I had a similar role in that I needed to get donations for the program, and I probably approached around 40-50 places asking for what they might be able to donate, with less than 50% success. Now, with the KBIA, I'm getting an incredibly positive reaction. The question I ask (other than what am I going to do with all this stuff) is whether the fact I was acting on behalf of a Church influenced anyone to give or not give. There are probably a few other mitigating factors, such as my increased experience in telephone conversation or in how to approach business for donations, but I believe that it would be incredibly sad if people negated to donate to a Church program just because it was religiously based.
Oh well, I do have to praise God for all the support I'm getting for the program, because if you haven't attempted convincing someone to wear helmets, I never reccommend starting with adolescent skateboarders. I.e. support definately required; in fact, any divine intervention in the area of saving some of these kids' craniums will be most appreciated and required. On the plus side, I'm starting to get a very small understanding of how God feels when He sees people not accepting His son to redeem their sins...
Oh, and remember: brain injury is forever; prevention is the only cure. (and if you're wearing a helmet and see me at a skate park in Kamloops, make sure to get a prize)
My job essentially entails enforcing and promoting the Skateboard Rewards Program for the KBIA, where I go to skate parks and the like and give rewards to people wearing helmets. Rewards include anything I receive from local businesses and last year ranged between a 2 for 1 coupon to t-shirts and $25 gift certificates.
This year, I decided that I need to aim high. So I contacted over 60 places, asking if they had anything they might be able to donate. To my surprise, I had 3 responses before I even began phoning all the businesses for follow-up. I've now accumulated t-shirts, DVD's, stickers, keychains, gift certificates, and more, all in the span of 3 days, and what's even more amazing is that I'm not even half way through all the places that sound like they might also donate something.
This brang up a question for me. As the DVBS director at my Church last year, I had a similar role in that I needed to get donations for the program, and I probably approached around 40-50 places asking for what they might be able to donate, with less than 50% success. Now, with the KBIA, I'm getting an incredibly positive reaction. The question I ask (other than what am I going to do with all this stuff) is whether the fact I was acting on behalf of a Church influenced anyone to give or not give. There are probably a few other mitigating factors, such as my increased experience in telephone conversation or in how to approach business for donations, but I believe that it would be incredibly sad if people negated to donate to a Church program just because it was religiously based.
Oh well, I do have to praise God for all the support I'm getting for the program, because if you haven't attempted convincing someone to wear helmets, I never reccommend starting with adolescent skateboarders. I.e. support definately required; in fact, any divine intervention in the area of saving some of these kids' craniums will be most appreciated and required. On the plus side, I'm starting to get a very small understanding of how God feels when He sees people not accepting His son to redeem their sins...
Oh, and remember: brain injury is forever; prevention is the only cure. (and if you're wearing a helmet and see me at a skate park in Kamloops, make sure to get a prize)
Friday, June 09, 2006
Finding a job, or just finding something
I am currently residing in Kamloops, B.C., where my parents live and I have lived for about 11 years. It's a nice place, potentially relaxing and entertaining in its own unique fashion.
One difficulty does arise for students (like myself) when they are attempting to fit back into Kamloops life: finding a decent job. A job which will pay for at least a portion of one's tuition and living expenses while allowing survival of the Kamloops summer (it's a neo-desert climate... for those who know me, yes, I get quite warm). So far, I have a position at DHL (aka Loomis), sorting packages. Other positions I have held this summer include entry watch at a pulp mill, farmer at an organic farm, and various chore-like activities. Sadly, the DHL job is at nasty times and hence blocks out a few other positions I have applied for, not that I'm overly concerned. You see, I know that whatever happens this summer, God will take care of me as He always has, and so my concern turns more to a question of whether I am seeking work which God would have me do, a question which is not as easy to discern as I may communicate. In my experience, He isn't interested as much in the job as the person doing the job, and how the relationships presented in the employment are fostered and grown.
Understand that, although I have taken 4 years of psychology and have many friends in various locales, relationships are hard. They take a lot of work and trust on both sides to make them strong and lasting. I can listen to people and keep up my side of the deal, but there are only rare times when I accept others doing the same, especially when I know that I will never see those people again. Hence my difficulty with that side of God's interests in my summer employment.
I suppose the reason for all this blathering is just to say that at times God's will and your own may not coincide, whether the reason is the difference in perspective (as one may imagine), or your self-interests. My suggestion is patience (difficult even for the most saintly of us) and a healthy dose of God's point of view (ie. ask yourself What does God want with the world? What does He seem to want with me? What is tearing at God's heart?). No guarentee, but those things have been helpful to me in the past few months of seemingly hopeless job searching, so perhaps they'll be of some small consolation to any who may be struggling with similar troubles.
One difficulty does arise for students (like myself) when they are attempting to fit back into Kamloops life: finding a decent job. A job which will pay for at least a portion of one's tuition and living expenses while allowing survival of the Kamloops summer (it's a neo-desert climate... for those who know me, yes, I get quite warm). So far, I have a position at DHL (aka Loomis), sorting packages. Other positions I have held this summer include entry watch at a pulp mill, farmer at an organic farm, and various chore-like activities. Sadly, the DHL job is at nasty times and hence blocks out a few other positions I have applied for, not that I'm overly concerned. You see, I know that whatever happens this summer, God will take care of me as He always has, and so my concern turns more to a question of whether I am seeking work which God would have me do, a question which is not as easy to discern as I may communicate. In my experience, He isn't interested as much in the job as the person doing the job, and how the relationships presented in the employment are fostered and grown.
Understand that, although I have taken 4 years of psychology and have many friends in various locales, relationships are hard. They take a lot of work and trust on both sides to make them strong and lasting. I can listen to people and keep up my side of the deal, but there are only rare times when I accept others doing the same, especially when I know that I will never see those people again. Hence my difficulty with that side of God's interests in my summer employment.
I suppose the reason for all this blathering is just to say that at times God's will and your own may not coincide, whether the reason is the difference in perspective (as one may imagine), or your self-interests. My suggestion is patience (difficult even for the most saintly of us) and a healthy dose of God's point of view (ie. ask yourself What does God want with the world? What does He seem to want with me? What is tearing at God's heart?). No guarentee, but those things have been helpful to me in the past few months of seemingly hopeless job searching, so perhaps they'll be of some small consolation to any who may be struggling with similar troubles.
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
I recently found this awesome website:
http://americanrhetoric.com/
It has all sorts of speeches, some of which are audio and video. It's interesting to examine their effect on you as you read them, and where that effect comes from.
I reccomend checking out the movies section, where you can find some of the better movie speeches with accompanying background music.
http://americanrhetoric.com/
It has all sorts of speeches, some of which are audio and video. It's interesting to examine their effect on you as you read them, and where that effect comes from.
I reccomend checking out the movies section, where you can find some of the better movie speeches with accompanying background music.
Sunday, April 09, 2006
Sunday, March 26, 2006
How are you crying out?
3THE VOICE OF ONE CRYING IN THE WILDERNESS,
'MAKE READY THE WAY OF THE LORD,
MAKE HIS PATHS STRAIGHT.'" (Mark 1:3 NASB)
I'll be the first to admit that I am in fact a distinct person, someone who is unlike most others, and I believe that God has made me so for a reason, just as he has made each of us unique. I don't mean to criticize those who follow fashion trends just because they're fashion trends, or those who have not taken the time to evaluate who they truly are and (if Christian or otherwise spiritual), how they fit into God's plan.
If you look throughout the Bible, there are times when masses of people are used for God's glory, and also times where the acts of one or two people create the downfall of entire houses or civilizations. God uses a plethera of ways to influence the world, and while we can understand that His ways are huge and definately beyond our comprehension, at times you have to sit back and marvel at what He does.
John the Baptist... what a distinct and unique person. Never mind the eating locusts, or the camel hair and leather. Think about this: he was crying out in the wilderness. One man. Big place. God's chosen mechanism to usher in the savior of the world, and he chooses someone we would probably lock up and drug up today. Why not use a great mass of people? Maybe a few trumpets, like back in the good ol days of Jericho? You'd certainly get a little more publicity than one person yelling in the middle of nowhere, especially with such an important event as the savior of humanity coming forward.
But God didn't. He gave us one man in the wilderness, a man who ate the pests which destroyed good crops and wore camel hair as clothing (which gives me hope as a person with a non-conformist attire). John was loud and he was effective, even when he was preaching from the pulpit of nowhere to a group of people who couldn't understand the full ramifications of what he was doing.
Now there is no wilderness, nowhere we can go which is desolate enough to require a John the Baptist; or is there? We live in a society where less people have a knowledge about Jesus, and more people think it 'cool' to throw insults at Christians than validly evaluate the faith we have (not that I'm complaining). Let's be that voice in the wilderness, that one faint sound in the middle of a parched desert of spirituality, the slight hope of light and peace in such seas of darkness and confusion. People will look at you strangely, but we have to keep crying out in praise of the only being deserving of it. If you have hesitation, think of it this way: if you do not show Jesus's love to those around you and, if they are ready, show them the hope you have in Jesus, who will? Who will?
'MAKE READY THE WAY OF THE LORD,
MAKE HIS PATHS STRAIGHT.'" (Mark 1:3 NASB)
I'll be the first to admit that I am in fact a distinct person, someone who is unlike most others, and I believe that God has made me so for a reason, just as he has made each of us unique. I don't mean to criticize those who follow fashion trends just because they're fashion trends, or those who have not taken the time to evaluate who they truly are and (if Christian or otherwise spiritual), how they fit into God's plan.
If you look throughout the Bible, there are times when masses of people are used for God's glory, and also times where the acts of one or two people create the downfall of entire houses or civilizations. God uses a plethera of ways to influence the world, and while we can understand that His ways are huge and definately beyond our comprehension, at times you have to sit back and marvel at what He does.
John the Baptist... what a distinct and unique person. Never mind the eating locusts, or the camel hair and leather. Think about this: he was crying out in the wilderness. One man. Big place. God's chosen mechanism to usher in the savior of the world, and he chooses someone we would probably lock up and drug up today. Why not use a great mass of people? Maybe a few trumpets, like back in the good ol days of Jericho? You'd certainly get a little more publicity than one person yelling in the middle of nowhere, especially with such an important event as the savior of humanity coming forward.
But God didn't. He gave us one man in the wilderness, a man who ate the pests which destroyed good crops and wore camel hair as clothing (which gives me hope as a person with a non-conformist attire). John was loud and he was effective, even when he was preaching from the pulpit of nowhere to a group of people who couldn't understand the full ramifications of what he was doing.
Now there is no wilderness, nowhere we can go which is desolate enough to require a John the Baptist; or is there? We live in a society where less people have a knowledge about Jesus, and more people think it 'cool' to throw insults at Christians than validly evaluate the faith we have (not that I'm complaining). Let's be that voice in the wilderness, that one faint sound in the middle of a parched desert of spirituality, the slight hope of light and peace in such seas of darkness and confusion. People will look at you strangely, but we have to keep crying out in praise of the only being deserving of it. If you have hesitation, think of it this way: if you do not show Jesus's love to those around you and, if they are ready, show them the hope you have in Jesus, who will? Who will?
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